A critical Article about Kerrang Magazine and my dislike due to it’s unintelligent articles and repetitive following of no name bands.
It’s a fact!, an unwritten law if you will that an opinion which is given by yours truly or any other no named fuck can not be wrong unless theoretically proved either by fact or some addition on a phone, but alas there is one thing, a magazine in fact which will go unnamed who’s opinions are prosaic and irritatingly banal.A little history of this magazine to start off shall we?This proverbial crass weekly supplemented thirty to forty pages of bullshit was first released on the 7th of July in 1981, where for a lucrative period it actually had the gifted knack of reviewing and notifying the readers of decent hard working bands which at one point had soul an diversity. But now this magazine is contempt with publishing feeble and repeated articles week after week which have nothing new to say or add to anyone’s existence.This is your basic Rock and Metal magazine which chooses to forgo the latter with now the term Heavy Metal been bounteously regurgitated we now have an onslaught of band coverage which no longer fits the typesetter balls to be classed with such a title, instead we have sub genre after sub genre after sub genre with the same faces on the cover who claim that they are the biggest and / or most powerful group in the world which really is a boastful and ridiculous remark made by these so called artistes who wouldn’t know musical prowess whether it came up and recreated note for note the most splendidly, technically proficient verse of chords and melody that we know of as music.It pisses me off to no end that the discovery that music would remain an art form in all it’s ludicrous and pompous meanderings has now turned into a money making, designer clothes wearing popularity contest where all that’s needed to get into the business is to know who to suck off t the right time and place.Is it just me or is the idea that the dream that music could actually mean something has died?This answer seems to loom as a definite yes as I sit patiently flicking threw the music channels and pages of these so called musical bibles to fin something that would catch my eye or at least keep me from throwing the remote and screaming in a fit of rage.Te values of music, the foundations of which they were built upon seem now to have been demolished an the rubble of all the so called influences of groups today have been swept under the carpet as we have now a carbon copy of last weeks hot ticket which burnt out as soon as their video ended up on the Internet.To give an example of how depressingly feeble things have gotten we have a new ‘hot band of the year’ the one tipped to be even bigger and better than the last one who graces the front cover of this pathetic and disturbingly high selling read that I wouldn’t’t take the time to wipe my arse on.Again no names will be mentioned due to the fact that if this prophetic, holier than thou angry rant shall ever be published then the ugly head of a law suit shall ensue and so this band will go by the name of Brides Maids From Scunthorpe.To surmise BMFS, they are the typical example of how things work to day with their miss mash of mixing more than at least three genres together to create a sound which has no beauty or verse to it’s proceedings and so ens up sounding like a bus crash with a dying baby wedged between it’s unprofessional performance and no only do they simply redo and shit on the old they also manage to base they’re attire on a legion of bands, also taking a nod from KISS by making their own special ’army’ that can be easily joined by the clicking of a button on their website.Of course originality in itself is scarce nowadays but Jesus Christ they could at least act upon their music by not repeating the same mistakes other have done before countless fucking times!This is one person who won’t be seeing them or reading that piece of shit.









Sun, Sep 16, 2012, by Tom Priestley
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